As promised...Taggart's Birth

Taggart at 5 weeks old

It has taken me a long time to post Taggart's birth for many reasons. The most obvious being that I have a newborn that likes to be held. I have had a hard time putting his story into words. How do you encompass in written words the perfect day? The day, the event, the moment was perfect- a dream come true. Evidence once again that when I let go of MY plans, MY attachments, and MY expectations and just let go and JUST BE and trust in HIS plan and HIS way that life turns out way more beautiful than I could have imagined. It was also evidence that faith and fear cannot coexist. So here is a brief summary (in more detail than I'm sure some would like, but I promise I edited it some) of our first homebirth. Hopefully the first of many.

Tuesday morning Dustin woke up and announced that he wasn't going to work that day. This was unexpected because he had been working as much as possible so that he could stay home AFTER the baby was born. I started to say, "Are you sure? I think you should go." When my mouth was closed, and I felt the prompting, "You all need this day. He should stay." I wasn't going to argue with that. We enjoyed a relaxing morning together as a family. At noon I went to my midwife appointment (at this point I was 10 days past my "due date"). I was at a 4 when I left the appointment, but I didn't think much of it. We took the kids to the park and then to Sam's Club (so fun). I had a couple of contractions at Sam's Club but not enough to get excited about. We got home around 3pm. The kids went outside to play (it was such a pretty day), and Dustin and I straightened up the house just in case. I had just finished the last of tidying up and sat down to drink some water when I had a contraction. It was 4pm.

It was short and mild. About 30 seconds later I had another one, still short and mild. The little contractions continued every 30 seconds for about 15 minutes. Dustin convinced me to call the midwife just to let her know. I called April and she said it just sounded like early labor. I was talking to her easily through the contractions, she couldn't even tell by my voice that I was having any. She said she had a 4:30 appointment and then she would send Kim (her apprentice) over to check on me.

By about 4:30 the contractions were strong enough and long enough that I made Dustin stop what he was doing and just stay with me so I could lean on him and hold his hands. But I had some good music on, and Dustin was there so I was doing okay. At about 4:45 I decided I was ready to seclude myself to the master bathroom. The contractions were pretty intense by then. I started to run a hot bath. While I waited I tried to keep my bladder empty so I labored on the toilet for a bit. I told Dustin that he needed to call April and let her know things were progressing fast (though I still thought I had a few hours). She said that she would send Kim right away. As soon as he got off the phone with April I had a really intense contraction. I remember squeezing Dustin's hands and telling him that I didn't know how many more of those I could do. As soon as I said that, I felt a quiet prompting, "You're at the end. You don't have to do much more." I looked up at Dustin and said, "We're doing this on our own. No one is going to get here in time." I saw shock for a brief moment in his eyes, and I'm sure he saw it in mine, but then there was nothing but peace and excitement.

I realized that the baby was crowning, and that he would be here in moments. I quickly climbed into the tub, mostly because I wanted to contain any mess. Two easy pushes and there he was. Dustin handed him right to me. It was amazing how instinct and intuition took over, and we knew just what to do. I just sat there in the tub, holding him, in awe. I loved that it was just us. Just the 3 (and lots of angels I'm sure) working together. It was beautiful and wonderful. Dustin called April and told her the baby was here. She told us later that she thought he was kidding until she heard the baby in the background. I believe it was about 5:07pm when he called her. I sat in the tub and nursed the baby until Kim arrived about 15 minutes later. April arrived a bit after that.

We brought the other kids up (the boys had been by themselves watching TV and Nellie was sleeping until my mom got home right after the birth), and they helped to weigh and measure Taggart. He weighed 9lbs 7oz. and was 21 1/2 inches. He looks exactly like Rigdon did as a baby.

I loved having a homebirth. Many people asked as if we were freaked out or scared. No. Faith and fear cannot coexist, and we had spent much time praying and pondering about this birth. We knew that it was okay for us to have this baby at home so we knew that all would be well. I have never felt so strongly my divinity as a woman, wife, and mother as I did when Taggart was born. That's my hope for every woman and every birth- that they feel that divinity. That they feel the power and pure joy of being a woman. Sometimes it is hard to remember that when there's laundry and crying, but being a mother is a great role.

Taggart 1 day old